May 13, 2012
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Dear Momma
Im writing this from my phone, hours after you’ve gone to bed. I’m snuggled in one of your guest house bunks. Joe is snoring in the bunk above mine. I’m remembering last Mother’s Day. The one where we went to the amusement park and I cried my heart out over everything overwhelming in my life and you made it all better the way only you can. Then we rode round and round on the carousel and the world made sense again. You’re always doing that, you know?
Every year I think about the commercialized ways to tell you I love you and I catch myself because I know you. That stuff is sweet but it doesn’t always hold its value. Earlier today we talked about the ways people manipulate or twist relationships by making the other person operate within certain expectations. Mothers Day seems like it would come with a lot of expectations, doesn’t it?
I thanked you today for how you look at my heart and not the gift in my hand. You don’t make any of us kids fit into a mold. You know how to receive love no matter how tattered, no matter what shape, no matter the words used. You get it. You just know.
I’ve said “our family isn’t normal” so many times this weekend. Our family isn’t normal because we have a weird sense of humor. Our family isn’t normal because we share real feelings and bring things out in the open and deal with them. Our family isn’t normal because instead of declaring the day off from mothering I watched you sit down and sort through some tough stuff with one of your sons today (much like you did for me last year.) Our family isn’t normal because you have never stayed in the lines and you love us wherever our life path takes us. I think there are a lot of families that miss out on that. I think there are a lot of people being manipulated or judged by those they need love from the most.
So, thank you for never holding expectations over my head. Thank you for making gut-wrenching honesty feel so natural (because it really is).
I love you like Cactus Jack loves his blankie by the fireplace.
I love you like Josie loves to whoop on her monkey.
I love you like Pecos Bill loves to give lizard kisses.
I love you like only I can. With these words on my blog. With the conversations (and comfortable silences) we will have tomorrow in those brown leather recliners. With my whole heart.
-Meecy-
Comments (12)
This was lovely and so heartfelt. Brought tears to my eyes. Also want to add, how is she? Please let her know I (Kathy) miss her and am thinking of her. Hope she gets well soon.
This was beautiful. Your momma’s going to love it.
This is wonderful, Macy — please tell your mom she’s missed!
Your momma is an amazing woman. I miss her around here.
Thank you Macy, you always know how to make me cry. I love you~
Wow. This made my eyes leak. You should know it takes a lot to do that. So beautiful. I’m so happy you have that kind of relationship with your mom and your whole family. (And slightly jealous.)
This is gorgeous. I love the both of you. <3
You and your mother are so Blessed to have one another.
I can’t even begin to express how beautiful this is. And your Mom is a blessing to all of us! Please send her my love!
Yay for WWW! And the legacy continues…
@heart_beep - @WakeUpLaughing - @slmret - Thank you for thinking of my momma! Y’all are so sweet. I know she misses you too.
This was just beautiful. I want to run and hug MY mom now (I have to wait until tomorrow.)
Years and years and years ago my mother came up with a “rule” for mothers day. handmade gifts only. Whether it was macaroni art, pancakes or a letter. The gifts needed to be made with love not bought in a frenzy.