August 30, 2012

• MMR

  I took a roadtrip with my dad and brother up to Pennsylvania a couple weeks ago. A roadtrip to see my sister Keara graduate from her first year at Miracle Mountain Ranch.  If you’ve followed for a while, you’ll know that I started blogging here when I was in the apprenticeship program at MMR. It’s the place I learned a lot about myself and my relationship with God. It’s the place I was challenged to pick apart what I believed and why, not to have the perfect church-y answer but to actually let my beliefs take root deep in the hidden places of me. It’s the place I learned what real friendships are. It’s also where I met Joe.   

  When Joe and I were newlyweds (2007) we went up for the Ranch’s Apprentice Alumni Retreat.  We haven’t been up there since then. That was 5 years ago! I was excited to go back, but a little apprehensive because I had heard though the grapevine of apprentice alumni that the Ranch had changed a lot since some crossroads had been reached and some of the staff had moved on and leadership had been shifted around. Their tagline had always been “A Mountaintop Experience that will last a lifetime!” and when a place and a group of people help to change your life in such a big way, its hard to picture it changing at all.  It’s easy to get defensive and protective of it.  But, one thing that I have learned (largely in part to MMR) is that CHANGE IS GOOD. Even if I don’t understand WHY it changed. Even if the change was brought about in an unpleasant or unexpected way, its better to let it shape you into something better than to sit around and wish your happy bubble hadn’t been burst. So I went in a little cautiously…not getting my hopes up….not wanting to be disappointed….trying to remember that change is a healthy part of life. More on that in a bit.

  Joe couldn’t take off work to come with us on the roadtrip, so before I left we set up the air mattress, grabbed some snacks, and made a blanket fort on our apartment porch. It is my goal in life to make my neighbors say “Why do we  have to live next to the weird ones?”  Change is good for neighbors too, hahaha. Anyway, the sunset was awesome, and there were twinkle lights, which makes everything better. I can’t be the only one who has white Christmas lights up year round…I never grow tired of them.

  Setting things up. 

  

  Blanket fort. 

  

  So goodbye kisses to Joe….and hello kisses to the campfire mocha frappe at Caribou Coffee. It was delicious. Fancy frappes make road trips official. Dad got the same flavor but in a steaming hot version.

  

  My bro Andrew opted for Monster and Mio. Not sure that he needed that much more energy, but you can tell he’s having a good time by the crazed look in his eyes.

  

  Along the way, I texted Joe my roadtrip location updates.  He was at work so he didn’t respond until his 2pm break. He let me know his non-roadtrip location update. “Still in Oklahoma”. 

  

  Somewhere along the highway in Missouri the weather started to get pretty crazy.  It was whipping our van around and there was light debris flying through the air. The sky was so dark. My phone had died so I didn’t get any pictures of it.  My dad handed Andrew his phone and was narrating (storm chaser style) the action as Andrew filmed out the mini-van window. We pulled off the highway at the first exit we saw and it happened to be this hole-in-the-wall country diner. Everyone was standing at the windows staring out into the storm.  We ran through the rain with all of our electronics and chargers and decided to wait out the storm with some bitter coffee.  We eventually decided to stay for dinner when we heard the hotel we were going to be staying at that night was in the direct path of a possible tornado.  My dad (or as many of your know him on my mom’s blog–Meteorology Man) lived up to his blog-land name by setting up a weather center command station in our diner booth.  He was in his element. 

  

  Back on the road once things settled down.

  

  There were so many accidents. This was a semi stuck in the ditch.

  

  We made it to our hotel safely that night, and the next day we excitedly pulled up the steep hill dirt road of the Ranch’s entrance. So many emotions flooded back to me at once, I thought I was going to explode. It’s just floating in the air up there. Soul-filling, heart bursting happiness. It was a whirlwind of hugging my pretty sisters, meeting apprentices (or students, I think they call them now), and catching up with staff members.  Every second I stood in the dining hall, every step I took up main street, every conversation I had….. I was reminded that what makes the Ranch go ’round is still 100% there! Gut-wrenching honesty. No walls. No masks. Genuine concern. Truth. Growth. Challenges. Encouragement. There are new buildings (namely, the AMAZING new central restrooms), there are new staff members, and there are some unique and amazing staff members who are noticeably missing from the picture. But what made the biggest impact was realizing that the heart and purpose of the Ranch is still the same. So I was feeling all of <—THAT when I saw Patty (my advisor when I was an apprentice. A mentor. A friend. A counselor. Someone who listened to all my secrets and loved me anyway and pushed me to sort through the ugly things that were holding me back.)  She was walking towards me. We jogged to each other (practically slow motion, like in the movies, haha) and hugged so tight. I immediately started bawling like a baby in the middle of the street. Happy tears.

  Okay, okay more pictures. We took a tour of all the new buildings, and I pointed out all the places I had been injured during work projects back in the day. Dad took this picture of us in front of the Livery paddock.

  

  There were lots of fun activities I didn’t get pictures of, because my phone was dead a majority of the time and my camera kept giving me an error message. Sad. We saw a Message from the Mount by Matt. I stole this picture of the crowd watching drill team from the MMR facebook page.  Can you spot us? Left to right: Keara, Teara, Dad, Andrew, and Me

  

  Grad Day. Look at us all dressed up! We clean up nice sometimes. Left to right: Dad. Keara. Andrew. Teara. Me

  It has been quite the run-around of last minute paperwork, change of hearts, and staff meetings to come to these decisions….but I’m excited to share that all 3 of my siblings in this picture will be attending MMR in the fall.  It will be Keara’s 2nd year, and Andrew and Teara’s 1st year.  I loved hearing stories about how they are doing and what they are learning.  I have lots of facebook chatting to do with them. And a little letter writing.  And a lot of praying.  

  

  My advice to you three?  BE ALL THERE. I spent a lot of time (especially my 2nd year and my year on staff) worrying about what I was going to be doing next and whether or not it would be important enough to make a difference. Don’t waste the time worrying. Your whole life passes you by if you’re always waiting for the next thing.  It’s okay to look ahead and plan ahead, but don’t let it take away from where you are right now. Just put everything you have into this next year. If you get to the end and you don’t know what you’re doing next?  It’s okay. One of the biggest things I have learned (and continue to learn) is that God’s will for our lives is not some elusive thing that we spend our whole lives searching for. It’s more about what I am doing with what is right in front of my face. You’re on earth for a short time. You’re on the Ranch for an even shorter time. Soak it all in. Learn everything you can. Then don’t let it just rot away in your head. Let it sink into your heart and change the way you live your life and the way you treat other people. Bible knowledge may impress some people, but if you want to make an impact in the lives of those around you, you’ll need more than that. People need truth, but they need LOVE instead of judgement from you. Dig deep into the Bible and study it. But remember this. If you read a letter written by someone you don’t know, you can’t understand it as well.  You don’t know the heart behind it.  But if you read a letter by someone you DO know, you can almost hear their voice as you read their words.  Get to know God on such a personal level, that you can hear His voice and know His heart when you read His words.

  Also, someone help Teara out if she gets stuck in a snow drift this winter.

  I LOVE you guys. 

  

  

  • 3:12 pm
  • 9 Comments